


To survive is not to live

by Blightedsoul



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-17
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-09-02 13:17:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20276524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blightedsoul/pseuds/Blightedsoul
Summary: It's pretty much how all of the victors won their games, the final battles each of them fought through to eventually win.It is also either the final battle they fought (their deaths) and their last thoughts or what they're doing now that the rebellion is over.I'll save the victors who didn't die for last.I know this summary is trash ;-;





	1. Calming of the ocean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 16 year old Mags and her final battle, then her final moments

_ **11th** _  
_ **Mags** _

It was hot, that was no lie. Mags had been biding her time, absent-mindedly making more and more fishhooks there were only two people remaining, her and the boy from district 1. She'd heard him, multiple times, he was strong in fact she distinctly remembered her district partner referring the male as a 'man mountain'. That fact was proved when he'd fallen to the floor with his head the wrong way round. She kept her breathing even and quiet, listening...waiting for even a slight rustle of the leaves behind her

She'd just finished lacing a tight vine through the edge of her latest fishhook when he emerged in front of her brandishing a knife and a wicked grin. "Hello..."

His smile faltered once she sent her fishhook through his cheek.

He screamed in agony and Mags took that as her opportunity, with the chunk of flesh still attached to the end she began to claw at his face using her small weapon. He blindly swung at her with the knife in a failed attempt to get her off and away. She took a deep cut to the cheek and a newfound determination arose inside her along with murderous intent.

She settled on blinding him and she dragged the hook through his eye trying as hard as possible to block out his screams of agony,her hands began to shake as his screams grew louder. Though once his hand wrapped around her throat Mags stopped shaking and only one thought filled her head. _"He's weaponless"_

His other hand soon followed in closing around throat and as her vision began to blur and her breathing slowed she frantically reached for his discarded knife and as she felt her fingers close around the hilt she stared him in the eyes (well eye) and plunged the knife into his chest. As a child she had been fairly sheltered when it came to death with the exception of having to watch the hunger games, but she could've sworn they always took much longer to die. She was confused, he had died so quickly and she could feel the air returning to her lungs, but her dizziness hadn't faded and her vision was yet return to normal, she looked down at him one last time. It seemed blood loss had finally caught up to him and her final stab to the chest was all he needed to be put out of his misery, his arms went limp and she swiftly detached herself from him coughing slightly and gingerly reaching up to touch the rapidly forming bruises on her neck. The ladder that dropped in front of her shook her from the trance she had fallen into and she grabbed a rung allowing herself to be taken to the Capitol. To be crowned victor of the 11th annual hunger games.

The victory tour was nothing special in her humble opinion but the Capitol raved on and on about how glad they were to have a victor from District 4. If she was being entirely honest the only emotion she felt was regret. It dawned on her during the re-run of her 'best moments' how heartless she must've looked, staring him in the _eyes_ as she drove his own weapon into his heart. Just watching the life drain from him and only then did she notice the slight grin she wore as he went limp.

_When she'd looked away they called it modesty_

And from that day on she saw the panicked look in eyes, the humanity in them, humanity she herself had lost, each and every night. The morning of the 75th reaping Mags had told herself one thing and one thing only.

Annie Cresta will not be entering the games.

When the little old lady raised her hand in order to volunteer the first thing anybody in the district felt was disbelief, but once that subsided there was panic. Each of the female victors looked at each other but their chance to take her place was lost.

Mags felt her heart break as she heard Annie choke out sobs next to her, but it shattered when Finnick's name was called.

When Katniss came over to her in the training centre she'd greeted her warmly, and when Katniss showed everyone what she could do with a bow and a few arrows she hoped the rebels saw her as worthy to fight for.

Once the podiums rose and each victor began to take in their surroundings a smile spread across Mags' face _"if only I was younger"_ she thought to herself with a chuckle. Though she knew two things for sure: 1) Finnick had a significant advantage over every tribute 2) This arena appears to be the exact opposite of fire.

After entering the jungle and having Peeta hit the force field Mags was decidedly tired, she sighed to herself and lightly tapped Finnick who nodded in understanding and requested they stop. It was then the seal of the Capitol lit up the sky revealing all who had died in the bloodbath and Mags found herself blinking back tears, for the most part she'd seen them grow up and it was hard for her so she settled on sleeping to try and distract herself.

She was awoken with a warning and promptly hoisted onto Finnicks back. The fog was a danger there was no doubt about that, however as she looked over her shoulder and saw the star-crossed lovers struggling so much she mumbled what she could to Finnick who stopped me began shouting encouragement to them. The situation worsened and Mags looked between the three young victors and made a decision. She had lived a long life and done a variety of different things.

She mentored Finnick and he was like a son or grandson to her, she had ensured Annie was safe, she had spoken to and restored faith in the mockingjay. For Mags, it was time to die. And so that's exactly she did, she removed herself from Finnicks back and kissed him, nodded to Katniss and Peeta and did the last thing she could do.

_ **Mags died.** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The writing will get better I’m sorry


	2. You can't hide from your demons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Once 18 year old Woof wins the 19th hunger games due to his camouflage abilities, he allows himself to hope that everything may just be okay.  
However the horrors of the arena and the guilt of his survival haunt him when he closes his eyes  
And the nightmare only seems to continue once he's awake.

** _19_ **

_ **Woof** _

"You can't win by hiding." It was one of the first sentences they had all been told. Woof had simply stared in response, wide-eyed and confused as to why they had been told this,as it turns out statistically it really seemed impossible.

More often than not tributes who attempted to hide were discovered on the first day, the capitol were given a spectacular show that year and the once hidden tribute had always screamed in agony as the alliance between 1 and 2 (he decided he'd need to come up with a better name than just the alliance but for now it would suffice) found a new way to torture them for the entertainment of the Capitol. 

Woof hoped it would be different for him

_But hope is a fickle thing._

He was now hidden within a large group of bushes, he hadn't eaten in a few days and starvation was beginning to set in. He unintentionally found himself daydreaming of his favourite foods, what he wouldn't give for some ice cream right now. A cannon firing startled him and shook him from his stupor.

_There were two people left_

_And one of them was him._

He came to the conclusion there was no way he could face whichever menacing murderer had managed to survive what they must've believed to be the final fight. However the thought gave him another idea, maybe he wouldn't have to emerge from his hiding spot after all. The girl from 4 seemingly appeared from thin air and Woof held his breath, she was bleeding heavily and clearly delirious, her hair was a mess and her eyes wide and wild. She appeared to be on the verge of insanity and if the twitching was anything to go by she very well was. 

Despite her clear loss of sanity she moved with purpose. To hunt. _To kill. _And yet every step she took was slower than the last and her breath became more ragged as she violently shook her head from side to side. Almost like she was trying to shake away the fatigue, the loss of consciousness that would certainly mean death for her. Woof stared at her with both bewilderment and pity, he watched siletly as she crumpled to the floor her once black tribute uniform now soaked a crimson red and he heard her last breath, he _heard _her last words and from that day forth he hated himself 

_"I just wanted to save my sister"_

The ladder appeared before he could even register what had just happened, the girls body lay just a few metres from him he began to shake at the sight of her clear as day. Her blonde hair matted together, a deep cut down her left cheek, the crimson liquid spilling from her side and the now vacant look in her cold dead eyes. He reached up a grabbed the ladder, frozen in place and still looking down at the poor, poor girl from 4.

_He'd proved them wrong._

_And they were **not** happy._

Woof never had a very big family, his father walked out years ago and his mother didn't have any siblings so for the most part it was just him and her.

_He had deprived the Capitol of their show_

_So they gave him their own_

Before his eyes, his mother burned, as did his house and maybe he could try to pretend it was someone else, but he heard her cries and subsequently saw her clawing at the windows desperately trying to escape the fire. He looked away when her eyes melted and her body fell to the floor.

After a few years Woof met a lovely girl, her namesake was also as pretty as she was, Daisy. After a few years they had children and Woof believed for the first time since winning the games he could be happy.

It's too bad his happiness was short lived

Age the age of 15 his daughter was reaped for the 39th hunger games, he realised in that moment that any shred of happiness in his life would soon be burned away just like his mother and now his daughter. A tribute had gotten particularly creative that year and in the mentors lounge he'd watched her flail and scream before falling to her knees, entirely unrecognisable other than the glistening bracelet on her wrist with the small daisy charm.

As the years passed he became less and less aware of his surroundings,choosing confusion over certainty, a white lie over an honest truth. By the time the 75th annual hungers games rolled around he mostly wandered the streets in search of something to pick, a simple little flower, a small reminder of the woman he loved.

The reaping saw his and Cecelia's names called and he still didn't know what was happening. All he saw were her children pulled off of her harshly and the single tear that fell down her cheek.

They arrived in the Capitol all the same and Woofbegan to try and convince himself that he was only there to mentor the tributes from 8 that year, even as he was forced onto the chariot, even as they trained in these me room as previous tributes, even as the podiums rose into the arena and the smell of salt water filled his lungs.

_'I'm only here to help'_

He thought to himself and he moved towards the cornucopia as fast as he could because if he was going to die, he at least wanted to die for something, someone. He saw Cashmere's knife whizzing towards Cecelia and threw himself in the way of it. The knife caught him in the neck and the last thing he saw was Katniss, Finnick, Peetaand Mags escaping into the jungle. 

_And for the first time in his life he thought he'd done something right_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave a comment on anything you think I may have got wrong I don't mind constructive criticism.  
If you don't want to why not just leave a comment about how your day is going :)


	3. 2 of 3 necessities

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When the 28th hunger games ends up being outlast as opposed to outrun the Capitol are less than entertained. But for 17 year old Seeder it seems to be more of a blessing than a curse.

** _28_ **

** _Seeder_ **

The careers had lost their food. Seeder was more than aware of this fact, she’d seen it burn when the temperature of the arena seemed to impossibly rise again. For some strange reason (most likely to have some variety) the arena this year had been a desert. It contained little hiding places and therefore hardly any shelter or protection from the sweltering heat. Luckily for her she’d managed to fill her water container due to a cactus she had discovered not too long ago, despite her thirst she resolved to ration it - only taking a few sips at a time every few hours.

You’d think, in such a plain arena she would have crossed paths with at least one other tribute in the last few days and yet, she hadn’t. This was due to the fact although the arena was plain it was also very, _very _big meaning that the odds of coming across another tribute were quite low. Most people had died of blood loss or heat stroke, she didn’t think a single tribute had been caught and killed by another since the bloodbath. So now it seemed as though the odds were in her favour - at least more than others. The only problem she had was the lack of food, it had been a day since Seeder had last eaten and there didn’t appear to be anything around to eat either, she sighed and hoped that she could outlast the others.

It had now been 5 days.

Seeder kept moving, sipping on her water as a way to stay alive. The careers lost their food around the same time she’d had her last meal, she had an advantage over them

_She had starved before_

She kept moving forward because she knew she had to, she was either going come across someone (as unlikely as that was) or she was going to find an ending or at least some form of shelter against the sun that bore down on her frail figure. She wondered what the people back in district 11 must be thinking, would they be proud of her? She hadn’t actually killed anyone but she had also turned her back on her district partner as he screamed for her to save him in the bloodbath. She shrugged after a little while of pondering these thoughts, it didn’t help her did it? The harsh reality was that he died, she lived and if she had gone back for him chances are she’d be where he was. 

Six feet below

A cannon blast caused her to turn around, though she instantly regret doing so as the world began to spin and she fell to the floor. She tried to push herself up but couldn’t muster the strength needed and so instead she lay still, just waiting for death rather than fighting it. That was until the ladder dropped before her eyes, she jumped initially but quickly realised what that meant.

_Seeder had won the 28th hunger games_

Her interview with Aurelius after the games was more awkward than anything else, she hadn’t won in a spectacular way, she’d just gone the longest without food. The interview didn’t last long at all because she didn’t really have much to say, even if she had the Capitol was much to uninterested to care. So the interview ended much earlier than anticipated, giving Seeder more than enough time to wander around and decide she despised the Capitol. 

In the years that passed Seeder had managed a grand total of just three victors, two females and one male - Chaff. She had grown very close to Caff seeing him as a son in a way, she hoped he saw her as a friend. So at the announcement of the third quarter quell the first place she went was his house, what she saw made her cry. He was a wreck, his front room was trashed and he was huddled in the corner rocking back and forth, she couldn’t comfort him because nothing she said would change the truth.

It could only be him 

So instead of kind words and white lies she crouched down next to him and slowly moved to pull him into a hug. “It’s okay” she whispered “I’ll be there with you.” His rocking slowed and he clung to her as if she was a lifeline because to him, she was.

Now, as she woke for the reaping on the 75th hunger games she really really did despise the Capitol. It had left Chaff in the firing line and her with a 1 in 3 chance of joining him, she hated being out of control in this situation but there was nothing she could do about it. Not yet at least, she’d met with Haymitch and they’d discussed rebellion more than a few times and had formulated a plan, which involved getting the mockingjay out of the arena. She was warned it may cost her her life.

_Her life was more than worth it_

The next week was blur, her memory resurfaces as she rises into the arena wearing a steely expression and with a determination she had never felt before. Things were going to change, she was sure of that. When she took her surroundings she felt a pang of fear for only a second, before throwing herself into the water and doing her best to swim to a spoke. Getting a grip on the wet sandy spoke was almost impossible and yet she ran to the cornucopia with no hesitation, for Chaff, for the mockingjay.

And so, when Cashmere’s knife flew into her throat she died as peacefully as she could because things were goink to change.

_And this is why she died with a smile on her face_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel as though I should point out the hunger games I put them in are accurate for their ages in catching fire, I calculate it to make sure that they’re as accurate as possible


	4. Lost a limb, lost a life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chaff was 17 when he won his games, though in the end he lost a lot more than most.

** _45_ **

** _Chaff_ **

_Pain_

It can be described in many different ways. Blinding. Sharp. Stabbing. Though nothing at all could even begin to describe the pain Chaff was feeling at this very moment, he’d just watched his district partner be brutally murdered and all he could do was run away. He hated himself at the minute, she hadn’t seen him so she had no idea he’d seen it all but he still felt all the blame. He had a weapon and it would've only taken a minute for him to intervene, but he couldn't bring himself to in the moment, if he had the likelihood was they would be the last two who'd have to fight it out.

_Chaff wouldn't have been able to handle that._

Not that he was handling the reality of what happened particularly well either. He settled on the hope that what could've been was worse than what was, there were now three people remaining, the male from 9 named Grain. Chaff remembered the name because he'd found it particularly strange, not that his was any better but it was still weird in his humble opinion, the other person who stood between him and winning was the female from 7 named Willow. This girl was the person who had killed his district partner and he swore silently to himself that if this girl was going to die, he'd be the one to kill her.

Funnily enough, she was the next person he happened to come across. She grinned once she saw him and the murderous look in her eyes told him everything he needed to know, this girl had lost her mind. She barely blinked before swinging at him with her axe, he ducked just in time and narrowly avoided the follow up blow she attempted to deliver, he slammed his fist into her stomach and she stumbled to the floor. He pulled his sword out from behind him and drove it through her abdomen, closing his eyes to try and block out the scream she gave. He leaned onto his sword, but didn't remove it, he was tired and sat down near her before sighing, "I'm sorry." After a little bit, he realized she hadn't actually died yet, she was gasping quietly and trying her best to remove the sword stuck in her. He glanced at her and took a deep breath, "Goodbye" he whispered and pulled the sword from her mid-section and instead plunged it into her chest.

The cannon that sounded confirmed that he definitely finished her off. Chaff moved away from her so that the hovercraft could collect her body, though he felt incredibly guilty there wasn’t anything he could do about the situation he was currently stuck in. Chaff closed his eyes and though it was definitely a stupid idea he fell asleep right then and there.

He did not, however, expect to be woken up by an inexplicable amount of pain. Chaff’s eyes flew wide open and his head snapped towards his arm, or rather where his arm should be and before he could stop himself he screamed, in both agony and shock. He jumped to his feet and ran, as fast and as far as he could before being a safe distance from the boy who had just cut off his arm. He tore the other sleeve off of his jacket and fashioned it into a tourniquet around his stump, he’d lost his left arm from the elbow down and had never felt more lucky to be right-handed. The searing pain he felt only seemed to multiply the more he thought about his lost limb though, so he re-armed himself and slowly trudged back in the direction of his assailant, trying desperately to stay conscious because he was terrified that if he fell asleep there was a high chance he wouldn’t wake up. 

An hour or so had passed when Chaff ran into Grain from District 9, the boy was almost as tall as him, but nowhere near as strong. Not to mention Chaff caught him by surprise, it took as much time as it had taken the boy to cut off his arm to remove the boys head. In a fit of rage he kicked the head as far as possible away from him and sank to the floor, tapping his foot trying to stay awake and slowly rocking himself back and forth. When the ladder appeared before his eyes he grabbed it quickly and firmly, fearing that if he didn’t the last thing he’d ever see was the stupid ladder that was supposed to grant him freedom.

Chaff didn’t actually remember much after that. A few doctors muttering about his injuries, the bright lights of the room he was in. Snippets here and there of the inbetween but nothing worth completely remembering. He did however clearly remember the look on each of the capitol doctors faces when he said he did not want a replacement arm, an even mix of shock and confusion. His voice has been different though, cold and angry because capitol people are born stupid and never have the need to be anything else they didn’t understand why he wouldn’t want their new fancy arm. 

Chaff didn’t want it because his district suffered. What kind of person would he be if he flaunted his brand new and obviously expensive arm, while the people of his district slaved away and starved.

_When the quarter quell was announced Chaff took it harder than most._

For him it was death sentence, no chance of someone else taking his place, no point in hoping it might be somebody else because it could only be him. And while he held no resentment towards Brutus for mentoring the tribute that killed his strongest chance or Katniss or winning when it meant the loss of Thresh he couldn’t help but think that things would be incredibly different if only Thresh had won the previous year. If that was the case as dark as it seemed Chaff wouldn’t need to worry because it wouldn’t be him, they wouldn’t have enough victors to do it. However when he stood at the reaping, seeing the relief on most parents faces he realised how much worse it would’ve been if things hadn’t played out the way they did. These parents would loose yet more children to the annual death games that had become normal to them, therefore as his name was called he smiled to the people. He smiled because he knew that each and every one of them had at another year with their children.

The podiums rose from below and Chaff could smell water, he sighed _custom made for four _he thought to himself. He watched the minute pass and decided to make a break for the cornucopia, which was a lot harder than expected but oh well, he managed to grab a spear before Enobaria swung at him and he took that as the best time to run.

A couple of days had passed and Chaff hadn’t run into anyone, that night he looked up into the sky and by the time each of the faces had showed up he hung his head. These people, his _friends_ so many of them gone and in just 48 hours, he slowly lowered himself to the ground. He wondered how much of this was worth it, Mags, Seeder, Blight, Cecelia, Woof, both of the Morphlings all of them were dead. If the rebellion failed it would all be for nothing. That last thought is why Chaff stood back up, he needed to find Beetee and then he’d have a part in making sure it all succeeded, he’d make sure none of their deaths were in vain.

It was nearing midnight, Chaff hadnt slept since the night before they first arrived and he still hadn’t managed to find Beetee, he pressed forwards but it was much slower than before. 

_The yelling caught his attention _

The unmistakable voice of Johanna Mason yelling at people to ‘come and get her’ he turned towards her loud voice and began to walk in that direction when something, no someone caught his eye. It was Peeta Mellark, Chaffs eyes widened as he and the boy locked eyes.

He opened his mouth when a spear pierced his stomach. With blood dribbling down his chin and the world dimming he said the first thing that came to mind. The last thing he could do to help, a warning. 

_“Run”_

He felt himself being pushed backwards and then the world was black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uploads will most likely be spaced out

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first work please be nice <3


End file.
